Women & Strength: We Don't Owe You Pretty
photo by: the loyal brand

photo by: the loyal brand

My squat doesn’t give a shit about your hard on.

The idea that a woman can’t or won’t attract a man (so many issues there to begin with) if they lift is as asinine as it is common. After all, why would a woman do annnnything that wasn’t 100% focused on making herself appear more desirable to a man? *eye roll so hard you die*. This notion is so problematic, for a myriad of reasons:

1. it assumes that women should only derive their value and worthiness from their ability to be “fuckable” (phrase from Krista Scott Dixon). If you’re not working towards that, then what’s the point? That is your only value here.
2. based on that, women ONLY engage in fitness for aesthetics and the pursuit of obtaining said fuckable status.
3. That status is rooted in being smaller, adhering to an arbitrary standard, and that women’s only source of worthiness is her appearance.

There is nothing wrong with training for aesthetics (body autonomy = you do you, boo!), but to assume that women only engage in fitness to be more aesthetically pleasing is complete bullshit. The fact that so many women have heard this break my heart. Your worth has about 0% to do with what some random ass human thinks about your level of desirability. I know it may feel that way and I know that the world has told you differently at times. But I promise, if you tell those people to sit down and shut up, a whole new world of people who see your true value opens up.

Women do not HAVE to care about being sexually desirable to the random men of the earth and Internet.

My deadlift gives literally negative fucks about some dude’s designation of me as attractive.

And yours doesn’t have to care either.

Get Resilient, Plus a free 4 Week Program
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Resilience

What is it? What does it even mean?
Resilience is the ability to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness.

Cultivating resilience is one the most difficult and important things someone can do. You must learn to have the self awareness, how to move through and around setbacks, and how to reframe “failures” in a productive way. A strong body is great, but having a strong mind makes it even better.

So many people simply give up when they hit a plateau or setback - but what if you got resilient instead? What if you learned the skills necessary to turn setbacks into wins? What if you could build a strong body AND mind?

Creating resilience is a long journey, but there are some key things that can help:

  1. Set an intention and goal for each day and find ways to win: Setting an intention or goal and working to accomplish that goal creates a sense of accomplishment, and that accomplishment turns in to confidence. Setting goals that are simple and realistic for the day, such as “finish my workout”, “eat 3 servings of veggies”, or “spend 30 minutes reading a book” are easy ways to win at your day. These goals also help direct your actions so that you can feel good about what you’ve done at the end of the day, even if you didn’t accomplish your goal.

  2. Recognize what is in and out of your control and work to control what you can: Listing out what is in and out of your control can be helpful way to evaluate any situation. Even though certain things may be out of your control, there are certainly things that you can control. And if you can control those things, do it! Bringing awareness to all of the things you CAN do to move towards your goal keeps you focused on moving forward.

  3. Create back up and pivot plans: The best laid plans often fall by the wayside the fastest, so have some back up and pivot plans! Think through various scenarios and find ways that you can still move towards your goal if your plans go awry. Finding a different training time, have a back up place to eat if you forget your lunch on the counter, and having a plan to walk outside if you can’t get to the gym are all great ways to continue to work towards your goals when things get a little whacky.

Building resilience is something that I’m incredibly passionate about for all of my clients and myself and it is something that I want to share with everyone. So, I decided to do just that and create an absolutely FREE program to do so.

Interested in getting a free 4 week barbell strength training program to help you get stronger, inside and outside of the gym?




Gabrielle BrostComment
Ramblings On Body Image
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Here’s some truth for you:  I am not comfortable in my current body.

 

Does that mean I hate it? That I stare in the mirror and say shitty things it?

No.

Does that mean I feel compelled to start dieting right this very second and exercise myself into oblivion?

No.

Does that mean that I say fuck it and stop training and eat things that make my body feel not great?

No. Although, I definitely do get down with some “fun” foods occasionally, because #fuckafaddiet.

Don’t get me wrong, I certainly have days or weeks where I’m pretty unkind to myself, because I’m a human. But more often than not, I don’t really spend much time thinking about the physical appearance of my body.

This is not because I don’t care about my body or my appearance (I do), but because my body is the vehicle that I live in. It is not a source of worth, the most interesting thing about me, or the sole focus of my attention. I do not force myself to be inauthentically “in love” with my body or spend energy shaming and speaking negatively about.

It is neutral territory.

It just IS.

It is ever changing.

It allows me to thrive.

It allows me to do things I enjoy. 

I’m not interested in dogmatic approaches that tell me how feel about my body. I’m not interested in approaches that take away my autonomy to feel and conceptualize by body the way that works best for me. There is not a one size fits all answer to issues of self-concept, self-image, and body image. Do what makes YOU feel best, on your own terms.